For her sake

I and kevin went to Jen's house this morning.

I saw her husband is at home since last night, and i called kevin and ask him to accompany me to face them both today. Saya dah lama nak jumpa mereka tapi selalunya tiada kesempatan. It is about the mission i've been writing about.

Yeah i know that i haven't say it clearly, but some of you have guessed it right. =)

Kevin came at 9. By that time, i saw Jen already opened the front door and i could listen to clara's voice already. I sms Jen and told her that i'm coming over. She said okey.

We went there hand in hand, sebab i nervous gile. I squeezed kevin's hand like asking for a shelter. he understood and he asked me if i want him to do the talking. but i said let me. sebab this is what i want to do. It's important to me.

I thought that it was gonna be a tough time to explain to them what i am planning for her daughter. Told them yang saya ikhlas nak membantu.

Membantu untuk pembedahan cleft lips clara.

All the expenses is gonna be under us, my family. We bear everything from the surgery, treatment, their trip to KL and meals and everything. They just need to agree and signed few documents for that. And im not asking them to pay me back. I just want to see clara cerah masa depan dia. i told them that i love clara. keluar juga airmata saya bila ceritakan semua rancangan saya. saya tak dapat tahan lah. rasa macam tak boleh nak simpan lagi.

They listened but haven't give us the answer. Tell you that the husband macam tak ada perasaan. dia agak sombong like i always thougt. How lah ...rasa nak stand up and point my finger right to his face aje. tell them to wake up and see what he has done to the family. what he plan for clara. takkan nak biarkan budak itu membesar macam tu je. nonsense.

Jen cried too. she was not given her right to speak. i went to hug jen and tell her to think about it.
Tell her that never my intention to separate them or whatever, i just want to help clara.
She is gonna be her daughter forever.

Yes, clara is their daughter in whatever circumstances. Tak ada niat untuk mencuri kasih sayang clara dari mereka. tapi kalau clara tidak mendapat kasih sayang dan perhatian secukupnya, saya rasa perlu saya buat sesuatu as a human being.

Kenapa saya rasa sangat susah untuk membuat sesuatu yang baik?