Kevin called me when i was about to go to bed. I didn't expect his call. I didn't talk to him for quite a long time. Told him i was busy and need to settle down with everything first and he gave me some time to move on.
"I miss you so much. Rindu sangat rasa nak balik jumpa you"
That is the reason he is calling me.
Felt like i wanted to run to him and tell him how i miss him too..
setiap hari,... setiap saat sebenarnya.
But only God knows. Why i'm behaving like this.
Simple.
I don't want to be a selfish.
If her mother said Kevin tak akan dapat bersama saya selagi dia masih hidup,
what more can i say?
I told him before that family comes first. I thought that the rejection would come from my family but it happened the other way.
Siapa tak sedih?
Tapi saya cubalah lupakan kesedihan itu. sbb saya ada hidup yang perlu diteruskan.
We are still together, we didn't break up.
That is why when people ask how's kevin and i are doing, i would say "We are doing fine"
Susah nak explain. I might be wrong. My decisions may look silly and sound stupid.
I tried to see and meet other people and do anything dengan harapan saya dapat beri kami sedikit ruang. Dan meluaskan ruang itu dari hari ke hari.
Kata orang, kalau sayang, lepaskan.
kalau cinta, berkorbanlah.
I think i should return kevin back to his family.
They raised him for 25 years. They loved him with all their hearts.
I just met him 2 years ago, and im not going to steal him just like that.
Ibu bapa datang pertama dalam hidup kita.
Cinta? Boleh datang dan pergi.
We talked for a good 10 minutes and told him he should not waste his money calling me.
Kevin asked
"Kita okey kan syg?"
I said
"Okey.."
Kesiannya Kevin.
kesiannya saya.
Then i cried till my pillowcase and pillow got wet.
No one heard me. No one listened.
:,(
Kevin, I love you and i still do.

















