Wet day

Raining again.
Feel so cold in this office.
Just had my cup of hot tea with left over mcD chips from my lunch.
Had GCB set and like it so much as I always like bbq and that kind of taste.
I always like my chips with extra black pepper and chili.
If only it still hot I can finish it up.
Too lazy to go to the pantry and put it in the microvawe.
Blah ah.

Clara had fever again last night so I have to go back early today. Eddie wanted to ask me to accompany him for dinner meeting tonight but I said
'Sorry I have a sick kid at home'
Arrogant kan?
Hehe he understood don't worry.
Eddie is as nice as a man could be.
But just can't understand when sometimes he could act like he is so down. And at the other time he could be as happy as a butterfly.
I got to move now.
Its raining and hate jam.
Bye

Anggurr

Sedang melayan Clara makan anggur. Dia memang suka sangat makan buah-buahan. Apa-apa buah pun dia suka. Good for her.
Tapi kelakar sangat bila dia cakap

"Nana buang tulang dulu"

Tulang?
Okey okey maksud dia buang biji dulu lah. Haih pening pala Nana fikir tulang apa pulak. Clara clara..

:)

Untuk yang beri komen dan pendapat pada entri sebelum ni saya ucapkan terima kasih banyak-banyak. Sedikit sebanyak membuka mata dan fikiran saya. Saya hargai. Saya ambil secara positif. Harap yang tersimpul akan terungkai sebaiknya seiring dengan masa. Insyaallah.
Thanks because you care


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Clara

Saya baru lepas ambil wudhuk pakai telekung nak tunggu masuk waktu maghrib duduk-duduk dulu layan Clara lukis-lukis. Lepas tu dia cakap
"Clara nak solat jugak Nana"

Macamana ye. Serba salah kan. Perkara ni saya tak ada bincang dengan mama clara. Clara di sini pun entah sekejap entah lama. Semuanya macam pending. Menambahkan lagi kesukaran.

Satu-satu perlu diselesaikan. Jalan yang mana nak bawa Clara. Atau sementara ni biar saya pimpin dia bersama saya.

Esok Nana belikan telekung untuk Clara ye. Kita solat sama-sama.

Nana sayang Clara. Hugss

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Gerram

Almost lost my voice calling supplier to look for venue for our new coming group next month. Then I had a break and downloaded several songs. I need it for my exercise session. Dah bosan dengan lagu-lagu lama.

Eddie is not in today. He is in physically. But his mind is not here. Nampak kusut dan serabut.
Went to him and asked
"Awak ok ke? What's wrong?"
He smiled and said
"Okey..okey"

Okey, since u said okey, its okey lah.
Bluweek eddie. You are not okey. Hate you. At least tell me lah what's ur problem.

I heard dia kena lecture dengan bos also. Boss was not angry. Tapi kena lecture. Ceramah.

Petang ni nak bawak clara and bibik keluar. Maybe to Sunway pyramid nak jalan-jalan je. Tengok wayang pun best jugak. Since esok cuti kan. Kesian dua orang tu asyik kena tinggal di rumah aje. Mesti boring. Nak balik mandi lepas maghrib bolehla keluar.

I make my way now okey..enjoy ur holiday people and Happy Deepavali.
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Monday blueS

I wish today is still Sunday.
Sangat malas nak datang kerja. Rasa nak duduk rumah aje boleh main-main dengan Clara. Semalam belikan dia buih sabun dia punya la suka main. Gelak-gelak sampai saya tak larat nak layan dia. Dah la tak sampai 10 saat bagi dia pegang botol buih sabun tu terus tumpah. Nasib baik dia tak jatuh sebab licin lantai. Hehe funny.

Pagi tadi dia bangun dan tengok saya bersiap nak ke ofce, dia gi ambik beg dia nak ikut sama. nasib baik makan pujuk janji petang ni saya balik bawak dia keluar jalan. Barulah dia cakap okey. Clara dah mula boring duduk rumah so its the time nak daftarkan dia ke kindergarten.
Weekend nanti nak gi survey mana-mana yang bagus. Qdees atau Smart Reader? Saya sebenarnya suka Genius Awlad tapi jauh sangat dengan rumah saya. Takut tak sempat pagi-pagi nak hantar dia jalan ke sana jem teruk. Will see how.

Eddie tak banyak cakap hari ni. Look like ada masalah aje. I tak sempat nak bercerita dengan dia lagi coz bertimbun kerja. Skype pun ada problem kat ofce ni hari ni kalau tak bvoleh skype aje. Ajak keluar lunch pun dia kata tak lapar. Just.. pelik.
Anyway mungkin dia tak sihat or whatever lah. Tak perlu fikir lagi nak buat kerja sekarang. Daaa

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Our dinner

Clara & bik Hera ikut diet malam ni.
Teriyaki chicken with Summer Salad.

We stayed in house today to recharge our batteries. Haha.
I'm getting better and hope tomorrow will be okey.


I have nothing to do so thinking to do some change to this blog look.
Bored with the old one?
How's now? Like it ?

Drop comment if u LIKE or DISLIKE =)))

A Thousand Years

Last night Kevin called. Tapi saya tak ada suara nak cakap. Tried to yell but could not make a sound. Demn. I really want to talk to him. Lots of things i want to talk about. Geram sangat.
He knew that i am sick. He said 'i call you again when you feel better'

But when? SOo stressful.

This morning when i checked my email, i found this clip sent by him with the note of Get Well Soon






Thanks kevin. I have died everyday waiting for you.
Miss you so much.

Oh! no

Tak sangka pulak berlarutan demam ni and last night was the nightmare coz I couldn't breath. Short breath. Tak pernah dapat asma lagi sebelum ni. Pergi klinik at 10pm. Doktor cakap mungkin lung infection sebab saya dah batuk-batuk lama. DoKtor tanya kalau saya nak admit kat hospital tapi fikirkan clara kesian pula dia. So I just asked for medicine dan doktor bagi nab & injection. If not okey still I kena masuk jugak.

Last night breathing was okey. Mubgkin sebab kena nab. But cough was bad. Really bad. Sampai clara pun terbangun in the middle of te night. Tanya 'why nana? U ok?' So sweet. clara memang tidur dengan saya since dia datang sini. So saya yang pindah pergi tidur bilik clara kesian dia tak boleh tidur.

This morning I lost my voice. Berbahasa isyarat sahaja. And cough still bad. I got 2 days mc. I want to rest but hope this sick will not stay long with me.
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Oh! Pavlova

Oh yey!
Baru dapat pavlova yang saya order.
It's gonna make our weekend.
Bawak masuk rumah terus potong tak sabar nak makan.
Clara suka. Mungkin ni first time dia makan pavlova but she likes it.
Mungkin sebab dia suka makan buah-buah segala jenis buah.
Okey la next time boleh order lagi.
This time saya suruh buat style pie, bukan cake.
sebab nak rasa yang crunchy-crunchy tu lebih banyak.
Kalau cake pun sedap juga sebab yang lembut macam marshmallow kat tengah-tengah tu sedap juga. Then yang ni kalau nak kurang manis pun dia boleh buatkan. special utk yang jaga kesihatan or yang ada diabetes. still boleh enjoy pavlova kan.

Rasa manis, rangup, lembut, masam buah-buah. complete!

Okey have a wonderful weekend semua.
We are ! ;)

Jaga kesihatan

Sekarang musim demam. So kena jaga kesihatan okey.
Little clara pun demam. Since last nite lagi dia macam down sikit rupanya nak demam. This morning bila saya nak ke office tengok dia masih tidur. Selalunya dia akan ikut bangun tengok saya bersiap then bye bye saya.

Bila rasa kepala dia panas. Saya tak ada reserve ubat apa-apa untuk dia lagi. So terus bawa dia gi klinik. Next time saya kena reserve ubat kan.. Kool fever ke ape. Supaya kalau malam-malam senang kalau emergency.
Saya rasa macam kelam kabut sikit la sebab semua macam first time. So mesti ada tertinggal dan terlupa sana sini.

Saya terpaksa ke office juga sebab ada important meeting hari ni. Tinggalkan clara dengan bik hera tapi make sure every hour tanya condition dia. Bik cakap suhu dah menurun dari pagi tadi. Cuma dia macam tak aktif sangat. Tak sabar nak balik ni. Hope she will be ok.

Malam tadi saya tiba-tiba rasa salah sebab tak bagitau kevin pasal clara. Sampai sekarang saya takut nak bgtahu dia. Dia mungkin kecil hati sebab big decision macam ni saya tak bagitahu dia. Its too late sebab dah berlaku. Tunggu bila saya betul confident baru nak cakap.

Ok back to work. Waiting for 5pm to chow !
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When I get hungry @ the office

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I believe i can

Yes, I have taken the courage to bring the girl here.
It happened unplanned.
When it was the time to send clara to her house on Friday morning, she cried histerically.
Wouldn’t let me go.
I cried too.
Jen was the one who asked if I wanted to take her with me.
I didn’t believe she wants this to happen. As a mother.
She of course love her daughter.
But she said, she rather see clara loved by me rather than she lives wihout full care and protection.
She can’t help much since there are another two children she needs to take care off.
Without a husband and a permanet job.

I called mama.
Within 5 seconds she said yes.
I know how much she loves clara too.
She was the one who always ask me to bring clara home.
I wanted to tell kevin.
But I changed my mind.
It’s not that kevin is not important to give his opinion but I want to make this decision myself.
Clara is important to me.
Kevin still doent know about clara is here.
I don’t know what will he say. He loves clara too so I hope he wouldn’t mind.
I’ll talk to him later.
The most important thing is I can see her now in fornt of me.
Everyday.
Don’t know until when.
But at least for now.

Is this the right thing I’ve done?
Can you give 100% focus on her Arianna ?

I believe i can
Insyaallah

I'm home.... and guess what?

To the maxx

Time run so fast.
2morrow dah Friday??
And I have to go back to kl already omg.
How sad cannot imagine.
Clara is sleeping next to me.
After she watched spongebob at my bb lepas satu dan satu. And giggled.
Rasa nak join je sekali but I had to finish up the wrapping and costing for eddie tomorrow.
He will go to site and I stay in hotel with clara.
Not fair to him if I don't help.
Bila boss call selalu cakap yes I'm with eddie.
Nasib baik tak kantoi lagi yang saya sibuk melayan clara.
Eddie cool. Dia tak de nak bising pun.
Walaupun dia sibuk macam ape.
Sesekali dia call tanya saya & clara kat mana.
Biasanya jawapan, kami kat mall.
Kami makan.
Kami kat kedai toys.
Kami beli coklat.
Wah macam gi holiday pulak.
Okey I am so sleepy.
I Got to sleep now.
Till later
Nyte :)
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Finally

Alhamdulillah.
Syukur sangat.
She is finally in my arm.
She is so thin.
She is thinner than the last time I saw her.
But she has grown up.
Beautifully.
Just can't let my eyes away from her.
I want to watch her.
Sekarang rasa separuh hati saya yang berat dengan perasaan rindu sudah hilang.
She ran to me and hold ne tight when she first saw me.
I know that she missed me too.
I took her with me to hotel today.
I don't know where is eddie but he must be very bz without me helping.
Now I want to take her out for dinner.
She said she wants to eat ayam goreng.
No problem darling.
Come !
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First day yang meletihkan

Hello kk.
I miss you.
1st 1st sampai di airport malam tadi jari terus tekan-tekan phone call kevin.
Tak boleh tahan my feeling of missing him.
Rindu yang menyesakkan nafas.
Lagi-lagi bila sampai di tempat di mana dia saya temui.
Eddie sibuk cari teksi, saya sibuk calling kevin.
Sorry eddie, hope u understand.
Kevin was happy too that I called.
And he already told his sister that I'm in kk so she will come to the hotel to see me tonight.
Miss her too.

Talking about today, I really don't have time to excuse myself ke rumah Jen to see clara.
Pity eddie nak tinggalkan dia seorang pun tak boleh sebab bz sgt.
Eddie asked me to go.
Sampai dia tolak-tolak saya keluar ke tepi jalan cari transport ke sana. Haha
But I went in back, just couldn't leave him alone doing the job. Even dia faham saya rindu clara setengah mati.
Esok.
Insyaallah.
I wish.
Ohh so happy nyaa

Just came back to the room.
Bought something to eat coz I'm so hungry. I didn't have lunch earlier sebab sakit perut.
Hope this tuna and bun and apples will treat me nice.
Till later :)


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Packing and happy

I hate to pack if I am leaving someone I love but this time I love to pack because I'm going to see someone I love.
How nice. Berdebar juga tak tau if she will like me as she did before. If she still love me like before.
Tapi bila call dia malam tadi bagitau aunty Nana nak datang she sounds happy je. And jen also happy to hear that I'm coming there.
Eddie dapat pergi sebab abah dia dah okey.
Semalam saya nak pergi melawat kat hospital tapi eddie call petangnya bagitahu abah dia dah dapat keluar.
Nasib baik tak serius sangat.
Eddie suruh datang juga pergi rumah dia.
Tapi since abah dia dah okey then maklong saya pun call minta tolong sikit kat rumah dia malam tadi tak jadi la saya pergi rumah eddie. Terus ke rumah maklong je lepas kerja.
Anyhow dah bagitahu eddie saya akan bawak banyak barang utk clara. He said its okey. Dia pun ada belikan clara mainan. Sure budak kecik tu suka sangat nanti dapat macam-macam. Not to forget saya belikan baju untuk 2 adik clara juga.
Emm smell mee goreng lah bik tengah masakkan. Lapar nak gi makan dulu. Perut dah bunyi. Kalau hati senang asyik je la rasa lapar.
Sampai choclairs ni pun saya tak sedar dah habiskan 3/4 botol since last week. Gile overdose gula dah. Patutla happy semacam
hehe

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